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It's the Little Things

You know how they say it's the little things that make the biggest impact? I typically find this statement to hold true. I remember a lot of small moments and things that have made a really big impact in my life. When a stranger walking down the street encouraged me to 'chin up because it was all going to be all right' years ago when I was living in Greensboro and having a bad day. Last year when I moved into my place and a friend sent me a plant to help congratulate and celebrate the new chapter in my life. Random texts and emails I get from students that I've worked with along the way with kind words. They all make a big difference.

Well I'm hoping that this holds true in a physical relation as well. This week I'm having surgery and now that it's getting close, I won't lie, I'm getting a little nervous. This procedure is different than others I've had in the past. For years (probably close to 10 at this point) I've known I have a deviated septum that I need to get fixed, but there were other priorities at the time. And when I moved back here to NC in 2012, I wanted to get this fixed and insurance denied the procedure. But now, it's finally happening. I'm hoping it will relieve the years of breathing troubles I have. I'm hoping it will help ease the sleeping issues I have. Rid the chronic sinus infections I get. But knowing that all these positive things (and probably others I'm not even anticipating) can happen doesn't ease my nerves.

Especially the past couple of days. Like when speaking to a surgery nurse and she bluntly says 'I'm not going to lie, this one hurts.' Or maybe making the mistake of Googling 'deviated septum surgery' and seeing some not so pretty photos. And then of course, with my crazy mind, thinking worst case scenario-- what if something goes really wrong and I just don't make it? I know, I know, I'm getting carried away, but I'd be a fool to not consider it at least briefly.

It'll be fine. I know. My mom, bless her, is coming down from Ohio to help take care of me and manage the little girls so I can rest and heal for a few days. And I have a wonderful community of friends here who have volunteered to bring my food, watch movies and entertain me during my week of recovery. I'm hoping having this little thing (that can't even be seen) fixed will make a big impact in how I live my life. I'm continuing to strive for happiness and healthiness and including this in a part of my path.

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